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Pregnancy and My Paranoid Mother

July 18, 2008

So, as some of you that know me closely (catwalq, incog, etc.) should already know, I moved out of my parents’ house about 3 months ago and I am now living in a “ghetto-adjacent” area of DC with my best friend. Now-being the lover of money that I am-it’s a great achievement that I haven’t asked my parents for any money yet, especially now that I’m paying rent and bills and all that other real world bs.

…Which is why it propably came as a shock to my mom when I called her and asked for A VERY SMALL AMOUNT of money that I would pay back. She initially said okay, then asked me what I needed it for and I told her. She said fine and transferred the money into my account.


Then about two hours later I received a call from my mom and she seemed a bit uneasy. I asked her what the problem was and that’s when this conversation ensued:

Mom: Rayo, I have to ask you something
Rayo: [thinking: “oh goodness”] Yes?
Mom: Are you pregnant?
Rayo: [trying to get over the initial shock] What??? What??? How….what? No! Why would you think I…what? I would have no way of being pregnant.
Mom: Alright then, bye…well actually I want you to come home for the weekend.
Rayo: Why?
Mom: We need to have a family meeting.
Rayo: Ok, Bye

Concentrating on work was very hard for the rest of the day so during my break I called my dad and when I told him about it, all he did was laugh and tell me that my mother was being paranoid (something I already knew).

Anyways sha, I just dismissed the whole thing and went on with my day. I went home for the “family” meeting (that didn’t include my two siblings but only my parents and I), and can you imagine that this woman didn’t even bring up the conversation????? Instead we”discussed”the ill effects of drugs, alcohol, debauchery, and tobacco, and why nightclubs are havens for such activities.

I almost died.

So I brought it up and asked her why she had asked me that question. She said it was because I had asked her for money out of the blue…

…So even though I had told her what the money was for, this paranoid woman still thought I was lying???

I didn’t even say anything after that. We finished the meeting and I left.

I’ve dismissed the whole thing now, but that conversation still makes me (and my friends) laugh sometimes.

Just thought I’d share this with you guys.

Do you guys have any paranoid mother stories?

12 Comments leave one →
  1. July 28, 2008 12:39 PM

    hah! You think you have it rough, then try living in a houshold with my parents.. 🙂

  2. July 29, 2008 11:06 AM

    my mum was born paranoid! one stupid question coming up; do u have two blogs? cuz i commented on ur blog last week, except it had a different template! the one with the SA pics?

  3. July 29, 2008 11:11 AM

    oops! scratch the stupid qstn! i just saw the other Rayo up there…lol. didnt know there were two Rayo’s. my bad.

  4. July 29, 2008 11:17 AM

    oh…mothers! i love mine, especially when she is paranoid! I laugh when she asks me if i am a virgin but indirectly, and she looks at me weird for the rest of the day. My stepdad laughs too…

  5. July 31, 2008 6:24 AM

    my mum………straight out inspector gadget……..if she wants to know sumthing just tell her….cos she will drill u like a CSI inspector!!!!!!!!!!but she never did ask me any one kain question..she trusts my judgement…….anyways i’d never answer and she knows, so we r cool!!!!!!!

  6. August 7, 2008 3:31 PM

    Easy.My best moment Mother moment?SHe called me into her room and delvered my favourite parent line.Son. SHe said. Be careful.Aids is not like love.It is forever!

  7. August 12, 2008 10:06 AM

    So there are two Rayos… I thought my reader was drunk 😉

  8. August 26, 2008 10:20 AM

    oya update us joh…

  9. August 29, 2008 8:17 AM

    motherhood and paranoia come hand in hand…wait till you become a mother and try to tell anyone otherwise…

  10. August 29, 2008 12:27 PM

    Paranoid Nigerian mothers have their own social club and attend all functions together. You didn’t know? Just hope you don’t become one someday. lol!How have you been? haven’t seen you around in a while.

  11. September 11, 2008 11:45 AM

    paranoid mother stories – when my mother was around, she went into my room and snooped the hell out of it all in the name of ‘helping me clean the house coz she was bored’..wondered what she thought when she opened my toy drawer!LOL…she didnt mention it but i knew she’d been…

  12. September 25, 2008 11:20 AM

    LMAO! Oh! How I love your mother!!! I’ve had my own experiences with her too, so this comes as no surprise.It’s CD by the way :p

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